


moments like these

by aylee_ann



Category: 2PM (Band), Music and Lyrics RPF
Genre: F/M, i love slow burns so there we go, i'm sad the ship isn't even in the tags, i'm still low-key shipping them, i'm still mad it got cancelled, m&l is better than wgm, story written in 2014, too sad the ship is kinda dead after three episodes full of fluff and love, uploading to ao3 merely for archive purposes
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-15
Updated: 2017-08-15
Packaged: 2018-12-15 13:04:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,327
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11806557
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aylee_ann/pseuds/aylee_ann
Summary: 20 (+02) moments of Lee Junho and Kim So Eun through the years.





	moments like these

20.

So Eun volunteers to help Junho learn his lines for his upcoming movie ‘Cold eyes’ since he’s always been the one to revise the dialogues with her if he happens to be around.

After half a bottle of wine, a whole pack of their favorite chocolate and two hours of re-reading his script, they’re both sprawled on the floor of So Eun’s apartment laughing and making jokes of his lines.

(He decides to learn his lines alone after that. So Eun might be help but also a huge distraction.)

19.

Junho calls her at 4 am while he’s still on his tour in Tokyo. He knows his timings are bad sometimes and that she always spends half an hour groaning and protesting about his early phone calls but it’s this friendship he’s formed with her since they both joined the show ‘Music & Lyrics’ that has turned her into a part of his life.

“You should really stop calling me.” So Eun groans into the phone. “It’s 4 am in the morning, for god’s sake. It wouldn’t kill to call me a little bit later.”

“I’m sorry. I just couldn’t sleep.” He mumbles, knowing fully well that she’s about to have a total change in her attitude quite soon.

“That’s really not my problem, Lee Junho. I’m hanging up.” And just with that she hangs up, leaving him waiting patiently on the other line. He’s already counting down the seconds when his phone buzzes.

“You coulldn’t sleep?” She asks, concerned.

Junho’s lips turn upward when he starts talking about all the things that’s been going on in Tokyo (totally forgetting about the ‘I couldn’t sleep’ issue) and asking about her schedules, coming events (because, yes, he misses his friend).

18.

She receives an invitation to the movie premiere of ‘Cold eyes’. She goes because she has an evening free and mostly because he deserves her support. They go seperately but their seats are arranged next to each other.

 

“You don’t look so bad on-screen.” She whispers, nudging him with her elbow lightly.

“Thanks. It’s really rare to hear a compliment coming from you.” He grins and So Eun nudges him again, this time harder.

They watch the movie in complete silence after. The way she’s so invested in the movie warms his heart somehow and when tears actually trickle down her cheeks when he gets stabbed in the movie, he reaches for her hand and gives it a squeeze.

She keeps complaining about his death (even when it’s already a week after the movie premerie) saying it is “unfair” and “unnecessary” to kill him off. She gets over ‘his’ death two weeks later, storming into 2PM’s dorm, advising him to choose his next role “more carefully”.

Junho gives her a nonchalant smile, receives warning glares in return.

17.

So Eun shows up in a concert held in Seoul. It’s the second time she goes to a 2PM concert. The first time he insisted but this time she goes without him knowing.  She sits in the first row right in front of the huge stadium, holding up lightsticks, wearing metallic grey make-up (2PM’s colour) and shouts their (Junho’s) name at the top of her voice.

 

He gets on stage with his brothers right beside him, holding the microphone close to his lips and says his most sincere greetings. His body stiffens for a whole moment as he glances down the audience and sees her sitting there cheering and clapping the lightsticks together. A wide smile makes it way to his lips before he goes back to being 2PM’s Junho, giving his best to the performances.

After the concert, she’s the first one to greet him backstage. He runs right to her and wraps his arms around her, mumbling how thankful he is and babbling about how overwhelming it was to see her sitting in the audience.

16.

So Eun throws him a secret party on his 24th birthday. Nichkhun and Chansung are instructed to take him out of the house for at least an hour while the other boys are required to give her a hand with the cooking and decorating.  
   
Junho comes home to a living room full of balloons up the ceiling, confetti spread all over the floor,  a big slogan with “Happy Birthday, Junho” on it and the people he cares about the most grinning, shouting ‘happy birthday’ all at once.

Her gift consists of a giant cork board (wrapped up  in beautiful paper and having a lovely bow on top of it), every inch filled with memories of them since the day they met. A few shots were taken when they first met (back then on the show Music & Lyrics) and others were taken over the years they’ve become friends. Some were random ones (taken whenever they met or went out together), some were taken on special occasions (Christmas, her house warming party with all the members of 2PM in the background, her birthday party last September, the movie premiere of ‘Cold Eyes’ and a backstage photo from 2PM’s last concert in Seoul ).

 Junho takes another one that night, a group photo with So Eun right next to him (his hand loosely around her waist). It happens to be his favourite one, he pins it in the middle of the cork board.

(Much later that night Junho carries the cork board into his room, making it a point to hang it on the wall the next day along with all these other pictures of him and his brothers, his family already there.)  

15.

They both are talkers but there’s this one topic they barely even touch. Like it’s forbidden, and that it’s better to just leave it undisclosed, undiscovered. Something taboo.

Junho doesn’t bother engaging in her personal love life because once it’s important she’d tell him and if he doesn’t have a clue about it, it’s probably just a fling, a crush that would go away after a short time. So Eun ends up telling him anyway, without him even asking.

He finds out So Eun still has feelings for Kim Bum (first love, boyfriend of 2 years- as she once introduced) when they’re on one of their nights out, dining at their favourite restaurant. After too much wine and her being all tipsy and unaware of what she’s even talking about, she tells him.

“I’m still in love with him.” She slurs, taking another sip from her glass. “Ridiculous, don’t you think?”

He ends up comforting her the rest of the night- wiping her tears, stroking her back while telling her jokes and making weird faces to make her smile.

She remembers nothing of what happened the next morning and Junho doesn’t bring the issue to surface, keeping it to himself and promising himself that he’d be there were  she to shed any tears over Kim Sang Bum again.

//

 

So Eun doesn’t risk toeing that dangerous line, somehow being led to believe that boys are fully capable of getting their own stuff together. And since he doesn’t tell, she doesn’t ask. It’s been like that right from the start (and probably has been agreed upon tacitly). But in the end, the beans are spilled and nothing is left unsaid.

Junho tells her about his break-up with a girl he met (someone not in the showbiz) when they are cuddled on her couch watching a movie together.

“I broke up with her today.” He blurts out, searching for her eyes.

So Eun turns to look at him, her left hand instantly reaching for the remote control to put the movie to a stop. Her head whirling for a moment before she can settle for words.

“That’s awful.” She whispers softly, moving closer to Junho on the couch. “Are you alright?”

“Not quite.” Junho manages, forcing out a weak smile.

“Don’t worry.” So Eun says after a moment, trying to boost up his mood. “It’s been more than a year since my break-up and still I cling but you’re independent, strong and absolutely capable of sweeping any lady off her feet with just one of those smiles. You’re Lee Junho!”

Junho cracks a smile at her attempt, heaving a heavy sigh. For the first time after that incident does she mention her break-up.

“Things went too fast and with my time schedule I just couldn’t give her the attention she deserves.” Junho closes his eyes before continuing his story in a low voice. “Besides, I’m scared of what will happen to her once the media gets wind of it, once everyone knows. She won’t be able to handle it. She doesn’t belong to the world I’m living and I can’t let her take the bullet just because I want her in my life. That’s too much to ask for.”

Silence falls over the both of them for a moment. Each one of them drifting away in their own thoughts. Junho thinking of how life never turns out the way he wants while So Eun broods over how to heal a broken heart, how to help him move on while she can’t herself.

“On the bright side, I won’t be too lonely in my single-and-available club.” So Eun offers him a smile.

“Yeah.” He laughs, finally. “No doubt in that.”

“I’m conducting my helping-Junho-get-over-his-breakup campaign. Starting from this moment! So don’t worry. You’ll be being the Junho with all smiles before you even know it.”

So Eun doesn’t ask her name, doesn’t ask about their relationship or how long it’s been going (a few months she assumes). She just keeps on being there for him- calling him whenever she’s not busy for small talks and to keep his mind pre-occupied, stopping by 2PM’s dorm twice a week just to make sure he’s not doing anything foolish.

Junho gets back on his feet two months later, partly due to her non-stop enthusiasm and the smile that never ceases on her lips.

14.

Pandemonium broke out when the news was announced. And though So Eun knows she isn’t even the least included in the Kim Bum – Moon Geun Young circle, she still finds herself on the verge of a mental broke down. (She keeps rescheduling her appointments, reasoning out that she’s exhausted, worn out or having signs of catching a flu. Her manager puts up with those ridiculous excuses for a week until he’s had enough and finally drags her out of her apartment.)

She makes it home at midnight that day and heads straight for the shower. She hears a knock on the door on her way back to her bedroom, clothes fully changed. So Eun doesn’t have to second-guess to know who might be standing on the other side of the door.

She cracks the door open and for the first time on that day, a genuine smile tugs at her lips.

“Thought you might want to have a TV night.” Junho grins, brushing past her to get inside the apartment without even getting invited.

So Eun rolls her eyes with an amused smile and closes the door behind her. “It’s midnight Junho. Shouldn’t you be training day and night for the next comeback?” She mumbles, settling down on the couch next to him as he opens the laptop he’s carried with him tonight.

 It’s a habit of them to watch movies, tv shows together on work-free nights. Sometimes at his place but mostly at hers. The special thing about it, she never knows first. He just carries his laptop with him (despite the fact she has one her own) whenever he wants and knocks at her door like it’s his own apartment. He never gets it after all, not even after her 2-week cold shoulder treatment. But she’s always all smiles when she sees him so it doesn’t really matter in the end.

“Oh, nonsense!” He snaps, flashing her a wide grin. “I always have time for my girl.”

There’s something in the way he looks at her, in his words that are along the lines of ‘you’re going to be fine, i promise’, ‘you’re better off without him’ and ‘hey, at least you still have me’  that makes her heart beat just a little (little) bit faster. (There’s a sense of deja-vu that hits her, taking her back to the time when she helped him through his break-up. She smiles, aware that they’ve come so far as friends.)

13.

Junho opens the door at 6 am in the morning to greet a casual dressed, wearing sun-glasses Kim So Eun.

“It’s adventure time, Junho.” She exclaims, pratically bouncing up and down out of excitement like a little kid who’s about to be given candy. “It’s one of these rare days we both have time. I have a list of things to do.”

She pulls out a piece of paper and hands it to him. Junho takes the list unwillingly into his hand and sighs inaudibly.

“One. Waking Junho up at 6 am just to see how messy he can get in the morning.” Junho reads aloud, rolling his eyes at her.

“Check!” She exclaims, taking the list from his hand to put a tick beside.

“This will take a whole day. And there’s no way I’ll enjoy this particular subway ride with you. You seek attention even when being dressed like this.” He groans, inclined to get back to his bedroom.

“Come on, it’s going to be fun. See here?” She points at number 5. “Having lunch at Junho’s favorite restaurant. I even have your favorite movie on my laptop for the last thing to do in the list, ‘watching a movie together’. I planned on throwing a sleepover party for you guys but couldn’t put it into action since there isn’t enough time left.”

Junho stands frozen at his spot, deadpanned, unable to move or utter a word. She drags him out onto the street half an hour later (after talking him into changing his clothes).

When the credits roll on the screen, signalling the end of the movie. Junho tilts his head slightly to give her forehead a soft kiss as a ‘thank you’ for the enjoyable day. (Despite his reluctance and complaints sometimes, Junho always ends up having fun around So Eun.)

12.

Junho shows up at Kim Bum + Moon Geun Yoong’s anniversary party (uninvited) because he knows So Eun would be going just to prove a point.

He has to lie to the security guards, telling them he is So Eun’s date. They don’t believe him at first but when So Eun spots Junho and comes to rescue him, they let him go in.

“What were you thinking? Gate-crashing a party?” She hisses into his ears as they head towards the dance floor, figuring it was much easier to have this conversation when their voices are drowned in music and the chattering that surrounds them. Besides, other couples would be too busy dancing to take any notice of them.

“What were you thinking? Going to his anniversary party? He didn’t tell you he had already moved on and you decide to show up. Are you completely out of your mind?”

“I wanted to show him that I’m having a good life, even without him.” He hears her voice cracking dangerously and decides to soften his voice.

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have come but I saw the invitation lying on your coffee table the other day and knowing that you’ll always be you, I decided to be the shining in armor. Anyway, you don’t have to prove a point to anyone. Haven’t you always been this strong girl?” He gives her a grin, and dips her on the dance floor, eliciting giggles from her.

“And plus, there is food for free.” She shoots him a warning glare and he only shrugs nonchalantly with one of those sheepish grins.

She relinquishes his hand before the next song starts playing, stating that she’s too exhausted for another dance. She settles down in a chair nearby and Junho comes to her shortly afterwards with dishes filled with dessert, her favourite ones.

Bum catches a glimpse of her (unintentionally), surprised to see So Eun and even more surprised to see that she has someone accompanying her. On top of that, he is taken aback by the smiles and laughter she shares with this particular guy the entire night. He excuses his girlfriend for a moment, saying he needs to greet a dear friend of his and makes for So Eun’s table.

There are those moments that can tighten your chest, churn your stomach, constrict your heart end empty your mind. One of those moments is when your ex-boyfriend decides to catch up with your life on his anniversary with his new girlfriend. So Eun doesn’t know what’s more terrifying, the fact that Kim Bum is pushing through the crowd to get to her table or the fact that his girlfriend is constantly throwing her curious glances.

“May I have this dance with you?” Bum lowers himself to a bow in front of her, holding out his right hand.

So Eun bites her lips nervously, torn between slapping him in the face and taking his hand. She opts for the latter one and throws back a reassuring glance to Junho who’s been shaking his head the entire time, stating in a muffled voice that ‘it’s not going to end up well’.

A slow ballad song is filling the background as So Eun awkwardly wraps her arms around his neck. There’s a cold shiver running through her body as he puts his hands on her waist and pulls her slightly closer. Both gasp for air when their eyes meet.

“I should have told you.” He finally admits, avoiding her piercing eyes.

She gives him a rueful look and chuckles lightly. It’s a good thing he didn’t. Because if he had, she would have done something foolish like calling him, like texting him, like going over to meet him to tell him that she still- that she has always been and will always-

“It’s okay.” She whispers almost breathlessly, her heart struggling to steady it’s beat. “We were over. We are over.” She corrects herself, daring- for the first time that night- to look him really in the eye.

His mouth opens instantly, gaping for words that are stuck in his throat, buried inside. Nothing comes out and she thinks it might be better that way. When his eyes are fixed on hers only, though, she shivers and tries hard not to look away. There’s pain flickering in his eyes, and maybe- just maybe, something else she’d regard to as regret. So Eun looks back and she isn’t sure if her eyes are already watery or if her heart is beating too loud, she just wants to hold onto this moment for as long as possible.

It’s the last moment I’ll ever have with you, she thinks and closes her eyes bitterly.

The song ends. She lets him go and knows better than anyone else, that this time she’s not looking back, she’s letting him go. She’s walking away. His eyes linger more than necessary, his hand brushes against her back gently, and with one last final kiss he plants onto her forehead. He’s gone.

Junho takes her hand when the next song starts, swaying her in tune with the soft music. She buries her head in his shoulder and stays with him on the dance floor although her feet are hurting and she only wants to go home.

(His tuxedo is wet from her tears. He doesn’t say a word, lets her cry it all out instead.)

11.

Things get better and life offers her too many distractions to even think about Kim Bum. She doesn’t mourn nor cries everytime she comes across an old photo, hears a familiar song or an unforgettable memory. She’s moving on, and this time it’s for real. She just wonders why it took her so long to finally be standing where she is right now- single and actually be proud of it.

//

So Eun isn’t the only one struggling to do the right thing in life. Junho himself is pondering whether he should go on this blind date or not.

He’s too tired of hearing not just his group members but also his manager asking about his dating issues. He’s 24 and sure he doesn’t meet up with a lot of people these days but that doesn’t mean he’s dating the one girl he spends most of time with- his best friend, Kim So Eun. On the other hand, he’s supposed to dine out with So Eun but then again, refusing to go out on a blind date Nichkhun arranged for him to be with So Eun? That wouldn’t exactly be the smart move. The ‘She’s my best friend. There’s nothing going on between us.’ speech would sound even more unconvincing.

He says yes to Nichkhun and calls So Eun.

“You’re busy?” She asks, disappointed.

“Yeah, I’m sorry. You’ve made all these plans and now I can’t go. Definitely next time, then?” He mumbles, guilt slowly overtaking him.

“Sure, it’s okay.” There’s a short pause, then “So what are you busy with? I mean, I thought your schedule is free these days... You told me yourself.” She bites her lips, waiting for his reply.

Another awkward silence and he finally manages to open his mouth. “It’s for a radio show. I just knew about it. I’m sorry.”

He hears her laughter from the other line and is somewhat relieved. “You don’t need to say sorry all the time. I feel like I’m a horrible friend. Call me later yeah?”

“Absolutely.” He affirms and ends the phone call.

//

 

Hanna (his blind date) shows up ten minutes late and keeps apologizing for the next ten minutes.

Turns out she isn’t as bad as her first impressions indicate her to be, she’s funny and smart and to be honest, it’s been a while since he actually had some time to go out with someone who isn’t included in his circle of friends. It’s a nice change, Junho thinks as the waitress brings out their meal.

The restaurant door opens again and his gaze shifts to the entrance out of curosity. Two giggling girls enter the restaurant and his breath is somewhere stuck at the back of his throat, a lump blocking his normal breathing.

So Eun and Goo Hye Sun (So Eun’s best friend) move towards his table, following a waitress who’s showing the two of them to their reserved table in the corner, next to the window which is only three tables away from his. Hanna eyes him curiously, quirking up her eyebrows as Junho holds up the menu with a view to not being recognized. It’s too late though.

“Junho?” His head snaps up and he is at a loss for words. There are no words that can get him out of this situation. No words that can even explain this to her and not make her misunderstand him. He tries and fails to get a sound out of his mouth.

“I thought you were recording for a radio show?” So Eun narrows her eyes at him, her arms folding in front of her chest.

“I- uhm- well....” He stutters, wondering all of the sudden why the hell he’s stuttering because if there’s one thing Lee Junho doesn’t do- it’s stuttering. He can’t help himself and so the next things that come out of his mouth aren’t even sentences but more words she can’t comprehend.

So Eun’s gaze shifts from Hanna back to Junho and back to Hanna again. Both Hye Sun and Hanna look dumbfounded, not knowing what to say or do, torn between leaving and staying.

“I’m sorry Hye Sun. I think I can’t have dinner with you today.” So Eun turns to Hye Sun apologetically, blinking her eyes to stop the tears from falling and runs out of the restaurant without another single word.

It doesn’t take Junho much time to figure out what to do. He mumbles an apology, tells Hanna he’ll call her (they’ve already exchanged numbers) and dashes towards the door.

 

//

 

“So Eun!”

He has followed her and she has no intention of slowing down even just for a bit. She quickens her steps as she paces down the sidewalk. He catches up with her easily, falling in step with her. The instant he grabs her hand, she pulls away so he puts himself in front of her, blocking the way instead.

“What do you want?” She asks with a mixture of pain and hurt in her voice.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you I just-.”

“You just what? Thought I’d never know?” She snaps, eyes brimming with tears. “It’s not even about you telling me or not! It’s about you lying to me.”

“See? You don’t even have words to defend yourself because that’s exactly what you did.” She hisses, her whole body shaking. “I’m not your girlfriend to have such control over you. I’m your best friend. But being your best friend doesn’t mean you get to lie to me. It’s not like you had a reason to hide the fact that you’re going out with someone else either.”

Junho stands there, silent, not moving and not making any sounds. His eyes simply stare into hers and a part of her hates herself for not being strong enough to look away.

“I don’t know why... I just thought it’d be better, simplier.” He mumbles, reaching for her hand but she swats his hand away abruptly.

“Just leave me alone for now.” She whispers, knowing fully well she can’t deal with all this now. She sees a taxi driving towards the direction, rushes to the cub and hails it down.

(Junho doesn’t follow her and while a part of her is glad for that another (bigger) part of her wishes he had. She doesn’t realize she’s crying until a teardrop falls to her quivering hands.)


End file.
